11 Mar Even billionaires are concerned about the “costs” of divorce

Billionaire T. Boone Pickens was recently divorced from his 4th wife and chose collaborative practice to settle his divorce.

For the whole story, go to http://www.bizjournals.com/dallas/blog/2013/03/t-boone-pickens-on-how-to-save.html?ana=e_abd&u=rk2Eh9uif4Sgj7UM9KhZGpj2jD7&goback=%2Egde_2936590_member_219548098

“The collaborative approach saves both money and emotional wear and tear on families.” Pickens said.

Should non billionaire couples consider the costs of divorce before choosing how they divorce?  Couples should do their research about different processes and the costs of each process.

Creating a  separation agreement with the help of a mediator means you share the cost of one mediator.   If you are choosing the collaborative law approach, you are each working with your own lawyers however,  much of the work can be taken on with the help of  other collaborative team members.

If you have a family professional, rather than your own lawyers,  they help to create and draft a parenting plan.  This is  a shared cost (usually at a lower hourly rate than lawyers).  If you use the assistance of a divorce financial professional, like a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (also usually at a lower hourly rate than lawyers) to help with gathering the financial information, you’re sharing that cost (and the work too as there is usually one spouse that has handled all the family finances and is better at accessing all the financial statements and documents).

Billionaires become billionaires not only because they make millions… they also recognize when they have the opportunity to save a million or two.

23 Apr DIVORCE AFTER 50- THE BENEFITS OF MEDIATION

The closer retirement, the more important it is to manage resources.  It takes a lifetime of planning for the years when more monies will go out than will be earned.

For most couples, their plans for retirement are meshed.  When kids are young, there are often dreams about what an empty nest will feel like.  When it finally comes, thoughts often move ahead to the time when leisure will dominate.

No couple plans for a divorce.  They are too busy working, saving, managing the household and just living life.  But recent statistics show that separation and divorce is growing more quickly among mature couples.  There are many theories, including the one that says the “baby boomers” are a generation that feels a strong entitlement to their lifestyle choices.  This is the generation that is now spiking divorce rates.

The math is simple the closer you are to retirement.  There is less time to save and a longer time to spend.  Preserving the nest egg means splitting it up in a way that will bring the most benefit to each person.  And spending it on a fight means less for everyone.

Mediation is a very useful process when maintaining resources is paramount.  Here are some good reasons for engaging a good mediator to help you work out your separation agreement:

  • It is better for your kids (imagine how hard it is for grown kids to see their family change)
  • It is your process and you can control cost and timelines
  • It is confidential
  • It gives you the chance to leave the process with an ongoing relationship to maintain a healthy family
  • The mediator along with a financial partner will make sure you understand what your financial future looks like and will offer you the opportunity to make market adjustments as necessary
  • You will be given the opportunity to work on your future, not to fight about your past
  • Mediation has been around for decades and has a proven track record of success
  • It is something you can both agree on

19 Jul New Divorce Laws in Ontario

Starting Monday July 18th, every Ontario couple hoping to end their marriage will have to attend an information session on alternatives to going to court before getting a divorce. This law comes much too late in the process. How will getting information about mediation help when couples have already started down the path to court and are  probably not speaking to each other amicably?

Studies show that couples who actively participate in settling their divorce is the single most important factor in getting a good outcome.

You should understand that couples  can take control over their separation rather than getting involved in the court process when they are first considering separation. They have  do have the option of working on a settlement on their own.  They can refer to various professionals as needed to deal with issues specific to their situation, whether that be financial, legal or emotional. You need to know all of this while they are still talking to each other . 

I know all couples can’t do this but I know there are couples that really do want to work together in a cost efficient way to organize their lives in the future. I, along with family mediator, Marion Korn, have created Mutual Solutions to work with these couples , working with them in whatever process that suits them best as an alternative to costly  litigation and court.